Search
 


Advanced Search
 
Entire Site

Goofball Login

Cookies must be
enabled to log in

Username:

Password:

Remember Me?

»Preview
» Why Register?
»Register Now!
» Renew Now!
» Who's Online Now
» Log In Trouble?

 

Assorted Goofiness
BakerMedia
College Humor
EHOWA
Fark
JokeDump
Mike's List
Ogrish
Zfilter

George W. Bush
 
"It's clearly a budget. It's got a lot of numbers in it." -Reuters, May 5, 2000
 
 

Random Quote
 
"One word sums up probably the responsibility of any vice president, and that one word is 'to be prepared'."
— Vice President Dan Quayle, 12/6/89
 
 

Snapple Facts
 
#93 A Kangaroo can jump 30 feet.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
is so stupid she thought she needed a token to get on Is soul Train.
 
 

One Liners
 
Q: Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex?
A: Mace will do that to you.
 
 


Burglar May Have Gotten Stuck

By: Chuck U FarleyPublished: 01/06/2000
 
Save article to file cabinet Send to a Friend Print this out

Skeleton Found in Store Chimney Burglar May Have Gotten Stuck, Police Say

PHILADELPHIA -- Police believe skeletal remains found lodged in the chimney of an out-of-business store may be those of a serial burglar who got stuck when trying to rob the place years ago.

Ironically, the man was attempting to burglarize a theft-prevention business in North Philadelphia, Detective Ramonita King said.

"Workers had been knocking down the chimney Saturday when they smelled a foul odor. When they got closer, they noticed a pair of sneakers, jeans and a Philly's cap and what looked to be human remains," King said. "It appears that he got stuck trying to enter the place through the chimney to rob it."

Police found a welfare card in the man's wallet and suspect he was a wanted burglar with many aliases, King said.

The medical examiner's office tentatively listed the cause of death as accidental compression asphyxia, officials said.

King said the store had been closed for many years, and a construction crew had been renovating the property for its new owners. She said the remains may be as many as 5 years old. Exactly when the business was closed is unknown, King said.

The medical examiner's office will be conducting tests to definitely determine if the remains are those of the suspected burglar, King said.

Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?


More Stupid News...

 

Search
 


Advanced Search
 
This Section

ARTICLE FORUM LIST  

You must register to participate in this discussion.
WHAT A (0 replies)  
started by donut38
(01.06.2001 0:03:50 AM EST)

WAY TO GO

Goofball.com is not responsible for any content which individual users post. Goofball.com reserves the right to delete any content which it deems objectionable or in violation of any law or regulation.


Most Recent
Woman Kills Husband With Folding Couch
St Petersburg's Channel Five said the man's wife, upset with her husband for being drunk and refusing to get up, kicked a handle after an argument, activating a mechanism that folds the couch up against a wall.
08.09.2008

Brothel Offers Customers Gas Rebate
Clients of the Shady Lady Ranch will get a $50 gas voucher if they fork out $300 -- worth about one hour's worth of services -- at the brothel in Beatty, Nevada, 130 miles northwest of Las Vegas.
08.08.2008

Naked Man Arrested After Hijacking Las Vegas Bus
Maybe he lost his shirt at a casino. Police in Las Vegas say they arrested a naked man who stole a beer and then hijacked a bus several miles northeast of the Strip ...
08.07.2008

Man Dials 911, Complains His Sub Had No Sauce
The sauce for a spicy Italian sandwich was apparently a must have for one Florida man. The man, Reginald Peterson, called 911 twice after a sandwich shop left off the sauce.
08.05.2008

Rate This!

3.28 Goofballs of 5
86 Viewer(s) rated

Rating the content is for registered users only.

Section Features
  • Top Ranked Items
  • One Year Ago
    Nude Man In High Heels Causes Lockdown
    McMINNVILLE, Ore. - A man wearing nothing but women's ...
    06.25.2007

    Mom Teed Off By Urinating Drunk Golfers
    OAK RIDGE, Tenn. - A mother teed off by drunken golfers ...
    06.24.2007

    Grandma Finds Condom In McDonald's Bag
    WELLINGTON, New Zealand - A grandmother was alarmed ...
    06.23.2007

    Man Arrested For Driving Golf Cart Drunk
    In the spirit of golf season ... I was actually surprised that this wasn't Roger.
    06.04.2007

    Two Years Ago
    Teattime Love Bite
    Was this the only way she was able to get him to make ...
    07.27.2006

    Kids' Show Host Fired Over 'Technical Virgin' Video
    The PBS Kids Sprout network has fired the host of "The Good Night Show" after learning she had appeared in videos called "Technical Virgin."
    07.25.2006

    And Why the Hell Do They Need Uniforms?
    Dennis FitzSimons, the chief executive of the company that owns the Chicago Cubs, said today that staff reductions would be needed to bring costs in line with other properties in the Tribune Co. portfolio.
    07.19.2006

    Aussie Woman Swallows 320 Condoms Full Of Drugs
    A woman who police allege ...
    06.29.2006

    Lookie Here!
    The Solo Joke Book

    Goofball Facts
     
    The number one profession among nudists is physicians.