Search
 


Advanced Search
 
Entire Site

Goofball Login

Username:

Password:

Remember Me?

»Preview
» Why Register?
»Register Now!
» Renew Now!
» Who's Online Now
» Log In Trouble?

 

› Home
› Contribute
› Goofball Map
› Jokes
› Photos
› Cartoons
› Media
› News
› Celeb Mugshots
› Name Changes
› Games
› Cool Sites
› Phone Fun
› Rants
› Uncensored
 » Photos
 » Cartoons
 » Media
 » Celebrities
 » Glossary
› Fans Section
› Goofball Women
› Message Boards
› Chat Room
› Deadpool
› Store
› About Us
› Link To Us
› Site Map
› Advertising Info
› RSS Feeds

Assorted Goofiness
College Humor
BakerMedia
Busted Tees
EHOWA
Fark
JokeDump
Mike's List
Ogrish
Zfilter

George W. Bush
 
"I know what I believe. I will continue to articulate what I believe and what I believe - I believe what I believe is right." - Rome, July 22, 2001
 
 

Random Quote
 
"It's now 22 minutes past 8:30."
— WKAT (Miami) radio personality Lynn Russell
 
 

Snapple Facts
 
#68 The longest one syllabled word is "screeched".
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
is so fat every time she walks in high heels, she strikes oil!
 
 

One Liners
 
Q. What do eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long?
A. Polaroids
 
 


Excerpts From The Classifieds

By: RobnoxiousPublished: 05/27/1999
 
Save article to file cabinet Send to a Friend Print this out

The following are actual excerpts from classified sections of city newspapers:

Illiterate? Write today for free help.

Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery. Try us once, you'll never go anywhere again.

Our experienced Mom will care for your child. Fenced yard, meals, and smacks included.

Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children.

Dinner Special--Turkey $2.35; Chicken or Beef $2.25; Children $2.00.

For sale: antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large drawers.

Now is your chance to have your ears pierced and get an extra pair to take home, too.

We do not tear your clothing with machinery. We do it carefully by hand.

Great Dames for sale.

Vacation Special: have your home exterminated.

Get rid of aunts. Zap does the job in 24 hours.

Toaster: A gift that every member of the family appreciates. Automatically burns toast.

For rent: 6-room hated apartment.

Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?

Related Links
  • News Headlines for the Intellectually-Impaired
  • Classic News Headlines
  • Newspaper headlines
  • Headline Bloopers
  • The Headline
  • A Look Back on Some Bizarre News from '98 part II
  • Stripping Stewardess Gives Airline Great Exposure
  • Looking for Love
  • Hugh Grant
  • Mom Packs More Than Lunch
  • Fishing For Booze?
  • Mickey Rourke
  • Facts: Largest Breasts and Buttocks
  • Shanghai Appears Convinced of UFO Visit
  • Man Wins Lottery Drinks Himself to Death
  • Tim Allen
  • You May Now Frag The Bride


    • More Top Ten Lists Jokes...

     

    Search
     


    Advanced Search
    		 
    This Section

    ARTICLE FORUM LIST  

    You must register to participate in this discussion.
    yep (0 replies)
    started by blazed3wayz
    (05.27.2001 6:02:35 PM EST)
    rednecks forever!!!!!

    Fuck this i'm going home.

    Yep !! (0 replies)
    started by sted5
    (05.27.2001 1:44:32 AM EST)
    Thats inbred rednecks alright!.

    rednecks (0 replies)  
    started by speedy417
    (01.04.2001 8:34:39 AM EST)
    most be writen by a bunch of inbred rednecks

    Goofball.com is not responsible for any content which individual users post. Goofball.com reserves the right to delete any content which it deems objectionable or in violation of any law or regulation.

    Most Recent
    Darwin Awards
    Yes, it's that magical time of year again when the ...
    10.06.2008

    50 One Hit Wonders
    You may not recognize these albums, but you'll probably remember the songs that made these artists famous.
    08.21.2008

    Dumbest Criminal
    Colorado Springs: A guy walked into ...
    08.11.2008

    25 Reasons I Owe My Mother
    1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE ...
    06.03.2008
    Rate This!

    2.97 Goofballs of 5
    61 Viewer(s) rated

    Rating the content is for registered users only.

    Section Features
  • Top Ranked Items
    • One Year Ago
    Darwin Awards
    Yes, it's that magical time of year again when the ...
    10.06.2008

    50 One Hit Wonders
    You may not recognize these albums, but you'll probably remember the songs that made these artists famous.
    08.21.2008

    Dumbest Criminal
    Colorado Springs: A guy walked into ...
    08.11.2008

    25 Reasons I Owe My Mother
    1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE ...
    06.03.2008
    Two Years Ago
    Top 10 Slogans That Belong On Colostomy Bags
    Top Ten Slogans That Belong On Colostomy Bags 10. “My other bag’s a Prada”
    04.25.2007

    You Know You Grew Up In The 80's If:
    You Know You Grew Up In the 80's if ...
    01.31.2007
    Lookie Here!
    Spy vs. Spy Casebook

    Casino Joke
     
    I know this crazy guy who just won't play at a casino. He just pretends to play in his head. Last week he lost his mind!
    		 
     

    Goofball Facts
     
    The state of Florida is bigger than England.