Last American Virgins
By: AcidInterval	Published: 03/01/2001
Mildred and Chester knew each other from childhood, but were in their nineties when they got married. They had to wait for Mildred's mother to pass away first. Back in those days there was no hanky panky before marriage, so Chester and Mildred were both still virgins. Needless to say Chester was pretty excited on their wedding night, having waited so patiently all these years. However, Mildred was very apprehensive as she had developed a heart condition and would have to tell Chester that they could not do it. Chester is now sitting on the bed wanting Mildred to hurry up. He detects a little reluctance on her part. Thinking that she is shy, he sends her off to the bathroom to get undressed. When she reappears in her silk sateen nightie, he gets her to sit next to him on the bed. Not knowing how to get things started he pulls the first strap on her nightie. She blushes just as red as her silk sateen nightie. She is really concerned about telling Chester about her heart condition. In the meantime Chester is looking at the first breast he has seen since his own mother's. It is hanging there down to her belly button; gravity having taken its course over some ninety years. He realizes her anxiety but figures she is going have to be helped a little more. Now he pulls the second strap and sees the second breast unroll downward before him. Poor Mildred is now beside herself. She is going to have to tell Chester about her heart. With a quivering voice and mustering up all her courage, she says, "Chester I have acute angina". Chester says, "I sure hope so. Your boobs look like hell." Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?
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dumb (0 replies) started by sethmo (03.06.2001 5:27:43 PM EST) this could use a little help with hummor

old whore (0 replies) started by StreetImperial (03.03.2001 2:35:52 AM EST) I'd say biatch gobble up the nuts... It's a beautiful day...now watch some asshole go fuck it up. I tried doing good, but good's not too good for me.

not 1st (0 replies) started by Anonymous Goofball (03.01.2001 5:45:39 PM EST) but being 4th is pretty cool

My ? is (0 replies) started by Anonymous Goofball (03.01.2001 1:08:58 PM EST) if they are in their nineties, how old was the mother?

Yeah but... (0 replies) started by Anonymous Goofball (03.01.2001 11:30:53 AM EST) I'm sure Chester's nuts hang down below his knees, so who is he to complain about saggy boobs?

First biatch!!!!! (0 replies)   started by TwiztidPimp (03.01.2001 0:28:15 AM EST) this joke sucked, but i'm still first

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