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If Only ...

By: robnoxiousPublished: 08/25/2006
 
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A guy is walking along the strip in Las Vegas and a knockout looking Vegas hooker catches his eye. He strikes up a conversation and eventually asks the Hooker, "How much do you charge?"

Hooker replies, "It starts at $500 for a hand-job."

Guy says, "$500 dollars! For a hand-job! Holy crap. No hand-job is worth that kind of money!"

The hooker says, "Do you see that Denny's on the corner?"

"Yes."

"Do you see the Denny's about a block further down?"

"Yes."

"And beyond that, do you see that third Denny's?"

"Yes."

"Well," says the hooker, smiling invitingly, "I own those. And, I own them because I give a hand-job that's worth $500."

Guy says, "What the hell? You only live once. I'll give it a try."

They retire to a nearby motel. A short time later, the guy is sitting on the bed realizing that He just experienced the hand-job of a lifetime, worth every bit of $500. He is so amazed, he says, "I suppose a blow- job is $1,000?"

The hooker replies, "$1,500."

"I wouldn't pay that for a blow-job!"

The hooker replies, "Step over here to the window, big boy. Do you see that casino just across the Street? I own that casino outright. And I own it because I give a blow-job that's worth every cent of $1,500."

The guy, basking in the afterglow of that terrific Hand-job, decides to put off the new car for another Year or so, and says, "Sign me up." Ten minutes later, he is sitting on the bed more amazed than before. He can scarcely believe it but He feels he truly got his money's worth. He decides to dip into the retirement savings for one glorious and unforgettable experience.

He asks the hooker, "How much for some pussy?"

The hooker says, "Come over here to the window, I want to show you something. Do you see how the whole city of Las Vegas is laid out be fore us, all those beautiful lights, gambling palaces, and show places?"

"Damn!" the guy says, in awe, "You own the whole city?"

"No," the hooker replies, "but I would if I had a pussy."

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    ARTICLE FORUM LIST  

    You must register to participate in this discussion.
    Haaaaaaaahahahahah (0 replies)
    started by marrakeshman
    (08.26.2006 6:06:14 AM EST)



    That is HE larious!

    ".....A good woman, good food, good wine and golf are the secrets to heaven on earth......."

    If only? (0 replies)
    started by thegrandpatron
    (08.25.2006 7:45:49 AM EST)


    For being only a two letter word "if" is the largest word in the English language.
    For example:
    If you Aunt would have had balls, she’d have been your Uncle.

    Las Vegas Hooker (0 replies)
    started by tjshere
    (08.25.2006 6:18:24 AM EST)


    Crocodile Dundee test

    That's why I always give the girls the old Crocodile Dundee test. Amazingly I've never had my face slapped.

    my schween is small but my tongue is mighty!

    ROFLMAO! (0 replies)  
    started by jimbobiglotto
    (08.25.2006 3:08:56 AM EST)

    GREAT ONE!!!!!!!!!

    -pretty good for one-handed typing, eh?!

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