Search
 


Advanced Search
 
Entire Site

Goofball Login

Cookies must be
enabled to log in

Username:

Password:

Remember Me?

»Preview
» Why Register?
»Register Now!
» Renew Now!
» Who's Online Now
» Log In Trouble?

 

Assorted Goofiness
BakerMedia
College Humor
EHOWA
Fark
JokeDump
Mike's List
Ogrish
Zfilter

George W. Bush
 
"This is Preservation Month. I appreciate preservation. It's what you do when you run for president. You gotta preserve."-Speaking during "PERSEVERENCE Month" at Fairgrounds Elementary School in Nashua, N.H. As quoted in the Los Angeles Times, Jan. 28, 2000
 
 

Random Quote
 
"An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools."
— Ernest Hemingway
 
 

Snapple Facts
 
#106 You way less at the top of a mountain then sea level.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
is so ugly when she walks down the street in September, people say "Damn, is it Halloween already?"
 
 

One Liners
 
Q. Did you hear about the new sushi bar that caters exclusively to lawyers?
A. It's called, Sosumi.
 
 


What Would Jesus Drive?

By: marrakeshmanPublished: 01/11/2007
 
Save article to file cabinet Send to a Friend Print this out

Most people assume WWJD is for "What would Jesus do?" But the initials really stand for "What would Jesus drive?"

One theory is that Jesus would tool around in an old Plymouth because "the Bible says God drove Adam and Eve out of the Garden of Eden in a Fury."

But in Psalm 83, the Almighty clearly owns a Pontiac and a Geo. The passage urges the Lord to "pursue your enemies with your Tempest and terrify them with your Storm."

Perhaps God favors Dodge pickup trucks, because Moses' followers are warned not to go up a mountain "until the Ram's horn sounds a long blast."

Some scholars insist that Jesus drove a Honda but didn't like to talk about it. As proof, they cite a verse in St. John's gospel where Christ tells the crowd, "For I did not speak of my own Accord."

Meanwhile, Moses rode an old British motorcycle, as evidenced by a Bible passage declaring, "the roar of Moses' Triumph is heard in the hills."

Joshua drove a Triumph sports car with a hole in its muffler: "Joshua's Triumph was heard throughout the land." And, following the Master's lead, the Apostles car-pooled in a Honda: "The Apostles were in one Accord."

Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?

Related Links
  • Borrowing The Car
  • Jesus Saves
  • The Villiage Idiot Towed My Car
  • My new car
  • Move You Car
  • Car Tires
  • I Got One Of Those 'Car Fragrances' To Hang In My Car
  • Where Is Jesus Christ?
  • Man Having Sex in Car Accidentally Calls Wife on Cell Phone
  • Expectant Father Gives Birth to Car Theft Plan
  • My car
  • Car ass
  • Subject: Did You Scratch The Car?
  • Car wash
  • Why Old Lady's Buy Cars
  • Race Car Loses Tire
  • Don't Touch The Car!
  • Jesus Action Figure
  • Tough Car
  • Remote Control Car

  • More Religious Jokes...

     

    Search
     


    Advanced Search
     
    This Section

    ARTICLE FORUM LIST  

    You must register to participate in this discussion.
    And I give you an (0 replies)  
    started by bd2son
    (01.11.2007 10:28:29 AM EST)

    AMEN!

    (_E=mc˛_)

    Goofball.com is not responsible for any content which individual users post. Goofball.com reserves the right to delete any content which it deems objectionable or in violation of any law or regulation.


    Most Recent
    Forest Gump
    When Forest Gump died, he stood in front of St. ...
    09.05.2008

    Graveside Service
    A young preacher was asked by a funeral director to ...
    04.11.2008

    God And The Scientist
    God was sitting in heaven one day when a scientist ...
    02.15.2008

    The Afterlife
    An elderly couple made a deal that whoever died first ...
    02.14.2008

    Rate This!

    4.00 Goofballs of 5
    11 Viewer(s) rated

    Rating the content is for registered users only.

    Section Features
  • Top Ranked Items
  • One Year Ago
    Preventing Disease
    Miss Beatrice, the church organist, was in her eighties and had never been married.
    12.02.2007

    Creation
    A man said to his wife one day, "I don't know how ...
    09.12.2007

    Who Does What
    A man and his wife were having an argument about who ...
    09.11.2007

    Off To The Races
    Mitch, a hard-shell Southern Baptist, loved to sneak ...
    09.07.2007

    Two Years Ago
    Young Preacher
    A young preacher was asked by the local funeral director ...
    11.04.2006

    Halloween Kiss
    A cabbie picks up a Nun. She gets into the cab ...
    10.31.2006

    Sex Work Or Play
    A man wonders if having sex on the Sabbath is a sin ...
    10.17.2006

    A Drunk Staggers Into A Church
    A drunk staggers into a Catholic church and enters ...
    10.14.2006

    Lookie Here!
    Top Comedy Movies

    Goofball Facts
     
    A whip doesn't make a cracking sound because it hits something, it does because the tip of the whip is traveling faster than the speed of sound (760 mph).