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George W. Bush
 
"This is a world that is much more uncertain than the past. In the past we were certain, we were certain it was us versus the Russians in the past. We were certain, and therefore we had huge nuclear arsenals aimed at each other to keep the peace. That's what we were certain of...You see, even though it's an uncertain world, we're certain of some things. We're certain that even though the 'evil empire' may have passed, evil still remains. We're certain there are people that can't stand what America stands for...We're certain there are madmen in this world, and there's terror, and there's missiles and I'm certain of this, too: I'm certain to maintain the peace, we better have a military of high morale, and I'm certain that under this administration, morale in the military is dangerously low."-Albuquerque, N.M., the Washington Post, May 31, 2000
 
 

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"Republicans understand the importance of bondage between a mother and child."
— Vice President Dan Quayle
 
 

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#90 The average raindrop falls at 7mph.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
is so stupid that she is sold the car for gas money.
 
 

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Q: What does a 75 year old woman have between her breasts?
A: Her navel.
 
 


Press Release

By: bd2sonPublished: 04/12/2006
 
Save article to file cabinet Send to a Friend Print this out

The Texas Parks and Wildlife Department issued a statement today saying Vice President Cheney broke no law by shooting a lawyer instead of a quail recently.

A TPWD spokesman noted that, in Texas, lawyers are not considered game creatures, and are thus not subject to seasonal limitations or bag limits. It was further noted that lawyer hunting was encouraged as the state is overrun with the pesky creatures.

A local food critic said that, contrary to rumor, lawyers do not taste like chicken, but rather like bovine dung which is a major component of their composition.

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    ARTICLE FORUM LIST  

    You must register to participate in this discussion.
    waaaaaaaa hahahahaha (0 replies)
    started by roger
    (04.13.2006 1:40:47 AM EST)


    Damn! I haven't heard that one either. I'm slipping on my text joke knowledge.

    lol (0 replies)  
    started by bigjohn2
    (04.12.2006 9:27:34 PM EST)

    pretty good one....

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