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Assorted Goofiness
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George W. Bush |
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"A new Iraq will also need a humane, well-supervised prison system."Bush, speaking at Carlisle, Virginia, May 24, 2004
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Random Quote |
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"I read a funny story about how the Republicans freed the slaves. The Republicans are the ones who created slavery by law in the 1600's. Abraham Lincoln freed the slaves and he was not a Republican." Marion Barry, Mayor of Washington, DC
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Snapple Facts |
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#145 Lake Superior is the world's largest lake.
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Yo Mama ... |
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is like a TV. set, even a three year old can turn her on!
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One Liners |
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Q: Why did Tennessee choose orange as their team color? A: You can wear it to the game on Saturday, hunting on Sunday, and picking up trash along the highway.
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 A Man, A Blonde And A Rabbit | | By: bd2son | Published: 06/12/2006 | | |  |
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A man is driving along a highway and sees a rabbit jump into the middle of the road. He swerves to avoid hitting it but, unfortunately, the rabbit jumps right in front of the car. The driver, a sensitive man, as well as an animal lover, pulls over and gets out to see what has become of the rabbit. Much to his dismay, the rabbit is dead. The driver feels so awful that he begins to cry.
A beautiful blonde woman, driving down the highway, sees a man crying on the side of the road and pulls over. She steps out of the car and asks the man what's wrong. "I feel terrible," he explains, "I accidentally hit this rabbit and killed it."
The blonde says, "Don't worry." She runs to her car and pulls out a spray can. She walks over to the limp, dead rabbit, bends down, and sprays the contents onto the rabbit. The rabbit jumps up, waves its paw at the two of them and hops off down the road. Ten feet away the rabbit stops, turns around and waves again. He hops own the road another 10 feet, turns and waves, hops another 10 feet, turns and waves, and repeats this again and again and again, until he hops out of sight. The man is astonished.
He runs over to the woman and demands, "What is in that can? What did you spray on that rabbit?" The woman turns the can around so that the man can read the label. It says ...
"Hair Spray ... Restores life to dead hair and adds permanent wave." Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com? |  | |  | Related Links Man Dies In Bizarre Case Of Bestiality
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More Miscellaneous Jokes...
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Some times I just have to tell an old joke
(0 replies)
started by
thegrandpatron
(06.12.2006 10:20:50 AM EST)
Barbara Walters was doing a documentary on the customs of American Indians.
While touring a reservation during the documentary she was puzzled as to why the difference in the number of feathers in the headdresses.
So she asked a brave who only had one feather in his headdress
his reply was: "Only have one woman, one woman, one feather."
Feeling the first fellow was only joking she asked another brave.
This brave had two feathers in his headdress.
And he replied: "Me have two women; two women ... two feathers."
Still not convinced the feathers indicated the number of sexual partners involved,
she decided to interview the Chief. Now the Chief had a headdress full of feathers.
Which, needless to say amused Ms.Walters. She asked the Chief, "Why do you have so many feathers in your headdress?"
The Chief proudly pounded his chest and said:
"Me Chief, me sleep with 'em all. Big, small, fat and tall, me sleep with em all."
Horrified, Ms. Walters stated, "You ought to be hung.
The Chief said: "You damn right, me hung, big like buffalo, long like snake."
Ms. Walters cried, "You don't have to be so hostile."
The Chief replied: "Hoss-style, dog-style, wolf-style, any style...me sleep with em all."
With tears in her eyes, Ms. Walters cried,"Oh dear."
The Chief said: "No deer. Ass too high, run too fast."
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A one-day weather forecast requires about 10 billion mathematical calculations.
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