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	George W. Bush
	"They want the federal government controlling Social Security like it's some kind of federal program."St. Charles, Mo., Nov. 2, 2000

	Random Quote
	"If only faces could talk ..." — sportscaster Pat Summerall during the Super Bowl

	Snapple Facts
	#82 August has the highest percent of births.

	Yo Mama ...
	is so fat we went to the drive-in and didn't have to pay because we dressed her as a Chevrolet.

	One Liners
	A Priest, a Rabbi and a Irishman walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says, "What, is this some kind of joke??"

Most Recent
	Unknown Chinese Proverbs Virginity like bubble, one prick, all gone. 11.17.2008 Suicide Hotline Iwas depressed last night so, I called Lifeline..... 11.14.2008 Words And Alcohol Things that are difficult to say when drunk ... 11.11.2008 Mick Jagger's Frog A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. ... 10.09.2008

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Section Features
	Top Ranked Items

One Year Ago
	Don't You Just Love Engrish? Doctors' office, Rome: "SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER ... 11.19.2007 Thoughts For The Weekend Wouldn't it be nice if ... 11.17.2007 Nurse A nurse walks into a bank totally exhausted after ... 11.06.2007 10 Year Old Blues A father asked his 10-year old son if he knew about ... 10.29.2007

Two Years Ago
	Jack's Last Will And Testament Jack has died. His lawyer is standing before the family ... 11.22.2006 Two-By-Fours Some men in a pickup truck drove into a lumberyard. ... 11.21.2006 How Moses Got The 10 Commandments God went to the Arabs and said, "I have Commandments ... 11.20.2006 Smart Granddaughter Grandpa was driving with his 9 year old granddaughter ... 11.17.2006

Lookie Here!
	UFOs, JFK and Elvis

	Goofball Facts
	Most carrots originally had a violet hue until the Dutch decided to cultivate them in their national color, orange, in the 18th century.