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	George W. Bush
	"I know how hard it is for you to put food on your family." - Greater Nashua, N.H., Chamber of Commerce, Jan. 27, 2000

	Random Quote
	"I told him, 'Son, what is it with you? Is it ignorance or apathy?' He said, 'Coach, Idon't know and I don't care.'" — Frank Layden, Utah Jazz president, on a former player

	Snapple Facts
	#126 A pigeon's feathers are heavier than its bones.

	Yo Mama ...
	is so poor you go out for Sunday pushes of the skateboard

	One Liners
	Q: Why do drivers education classes in Redneck schools use the car only on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays? A: Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the Sex Ed class uses it.

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	401-Keg Plan If you had purchased $1000.00 of Nortel stock one year ago, it would now be worth $49.00 10.11.2008 Best 'Out Of Office' Automatic E-mail Replies 1. I am currently out of the office at a job interview ... 08.16.2008 Bad News A patient was at her doctor's office after undergoing ... 08.14.2008 Never Question A Drunk I was shopping at the local supermarket where I selected: A ... 08.03.2008

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One Year Ago
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Two Years Ago
	Boss Bird A man entered a pet shop, wanting to buy a parrot. ... 12.07.2006 Knowing Where To Put It There was an engineer who had an exceptional gift ... 12.01.2006 Top 15 Slogans Rejected By Motel 6 15. Because your neighbor's wife deserves better than ... 11.16.2006 I'll Throw The Money On The Floor Johnny wanted to screw a girl in his office ... 10.25.2006

Lookie Here!
	The New Yorker 75th Anniversary Cartoon Collection

	Goofball Facts
	Drew Carey once worked at Denny's.