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George W. Bush
 
"More Muslims have died at the hands of killers than - I say more Muslims - a lot of Muslims have died - I don't know the exact count - at Istanbul. Look at these different places around the world where there's been tremendous death and destruction because killers kill." - Washington, D.C., Jan. 29, 2004
 
 

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"Just try to imagine what it would be like to be 300 million years old."
— President Clinton in Ashe County, N.C. He was speaking on the banks of the New River, which scientists say is the oldest river in the United States.
 
 

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#31 The average human will eat an average of 8 spiders while sleeping.
 
 

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Q. Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex?
A. Mace will do that to you.
 
 


Career Change

By: Carl FoghPublished: 08/08/2000
 
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A gynecologist had a burning desire to change careers and become a mechanic. So she found out from her local tech college what was involved, signed up for evening classes and attended diligently, learning all she could. When time for the practical exam approached, she prepared carefully for weeks, and completed the exam with tremendous skill.

When the results came back, she was surprised to find that she had obtained a mark of 150%. Fearing an error, she called the instructor, saying "I don't want to appear ungrateful for such an outstanding result, but I wondered if there had been an error which needed adjusting."

The instructor said, "During the exam, you took the engine apart perfectly, which was worth 50% of the total mark. You put the engine back together again perfectly, which is also worth 50% of the mark. I gave you an extra 50% because you did all of it THROUGH the muffler..."

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    This Section

    ARTICLE FORUM LIST  

    You must register to participate in this discussion.
    I thought it was funny (0 replies)
    started by roger
    (05.17.2003 1:05:48 AM EST)


    but that's just me


    Just protecting my sheep
    sucks (0 replies)
    started by Anonymous Goofball
    (09.20.2000 1:43:25 PM EST)

    i didnt get it

    thanx for... (0 replies)
    started by bat
    (08.09.2000 8:54:18 AM EST)

    clearing that up Lew

    Love your country,Question your government.

    It's a little funnier.. (0 replies)
    started by LewisCPher
    (08.08.2000 9:33:26 PM EST)

    (but not much) when the correct punch line is used. He did it through the tailpipe, not the muffler.

    Ting-a-ling, you sonofabitch!!

    Not as bad... (0 replies)
    started by Vandalier
    (08.08.2000 12:43:42 PM EST)

    ...as the others I've heard lately

    WTF??!!?? (0 replies)
    started by Anonymous Goofball
    (08.08.2000 12:19:30 PM EST)

    what??!?

    Blah.. (0 replies)
    started by NakedCanuck
    (08.08.2000 11:42:38 AM EST)

    ....not the laughs I was hoping for.

    The Naked Canuck Everybody is somebody else’s weirdo.

    Blah.. (0 replies)
    started by NakedCanuck
    (08.08.2000 11:38:28 AM EST)

    ....not the laughs I was hoping for.

    The Naked Canuck Everybody is somebody else’s weirdo.

    YOU SUCK DICK (1 reply)
    started by Anonymous Goofball
    (08.08.2000 10:04:41 AM EST)

    You're right, you are first....first to get it up the ass you fucking phag! GET A LIFE!!!!

    awwww shit (0 replies)
    started by rook30505
    (08.08.2000 2:28:08 AM EST)

    I heard this joke a long time ago

    Spank my ass!

    First Again I rule (0 replies)  
    started by thehoedepot
    (08.08.2000 0:06:21 AM EST)

    Im first again

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