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George W. Bush
 
"This is Preservation Month. I appreciate preservation. It's what you do when you run for president. You gotta preserve."-Speaking during "PERSEVERENCE Month" at Fairgrounds Elementary School in Nashua, N.H. As quoted in the Los Angeles Times, Jan. 28, 2000
 
 

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"Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut."
— Ernest Hemingway
 
 

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#106 You way less at the top of a mountain then sea level.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
is so ugly the government moved Halloween to her birthday.
 
 

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Q. Did you hear about the new sushi bar that caters exclusively to lawyers?
A. It's called, Sosumi.
 
 


Top 10 reasons to go to Work Naked

By: G. TellermanPublished: 04/20/2000
 
Save article to file cabinet Send to a Friend Print this out

(Okay, 11!)

11. No one ever steals your chair.

10. Gives "bad hair day" a whole new meaning.

9. Diverts attention from the fact that you also came to work drunk.

8. People stop stealing your pens after they've seen where you keep them.

7. So that -with a little help from Muzak- you can add "Exotic Dancer" to your exaggerated resume.

6. You want to see if it's like the dream.

5. To stop those creepy guys in Marketing from looking down your blouse.

4. "I'd love to chip in, but I left my wallet in my pants."

3. Inventive way to finally meet that special person in Human Resources.

2. Can take advantage of computer monitor radiation to work on your tan.

... And (drum roll) the number one reason to Go To Work Naked:
1. Your boss is always yelling, "I wanna see your ass in here by 8:00!"

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You must register to participate in this discussion.
datsagoodone (0 replies)
started by stupidfuck
(05.17.2001 2:28:22 PM EST)

where would you keep your pens... oh, never mind.
(I would think that it would keep one from chewing on their pens,also...ICK!)

jumpinjeezuzonafrigginpogostick!

love yor site (0 replies)
started by myherb
(03.02.2001 7:12:06 PM EST)

best site iv seen in a long time all my peps love it too

what a long strange trip its been

Sweet (0 replies)
started by plaqueboy
(02.23.2001 2:32:57 PM EST)

That waz quite good but where waz the porn

hmm.. (0 replies)
started by KoRnGiRl000
(02.09.2001 6:38:03 PM EST)

i think ill try this....

Thats nuts yo!

in response to the previous dickhead's message (1 reply)
started by psychoares
(01.28.2001 8:04:13 PM EST)

First of all I would like to state that no one forces you to read the jokes posted on this site. If someone does, please, get help! Secondly, you need to be in school if you have tendency to write with so little purpose. Since you obviously do not attend any institute of learning, I will copy your message and correct your grammar, spelling, and capitalization.

You're such a fucking retard, get a life! If you are writing stupid shit like that, then you have way too much time! So, fuck you and fuck all the others too!!!! (I left your previous sentence some what as you wrote it, but I would suggest that you substitute "too" for "like you", or something along that line.

Way to much fucken time (2 replies)
started by Anonymous Goofball
(01.12.2001 1:34:43 PM EST)

your such a fucken retard get a life! if oyu are writungstupid shit like that that then you have way to much time! so fuck you and fuck all the others TOO!!!!

will (0 replies)
started by Anonymous Goofball
(12.06.2000 2:51:11 PM EST)

will there ever be an 'after' goofball ?

what was before 'goofball' ?

will (0 replies)
started by Anonymous Goofball
(12.06.2000 2:46:15 PM EST)

will there ever be an 'after' goofball ?

what was before 'goofball' ?

REAL (1 reply)
started by Anonymous Goofball
(12.01.2000 11:57:08 PM EST)

iF YOU ARE A WOMEN DON'T WRITE BACK PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEA

sounds good (0 replies)
started by kldoyle
(11.17.2000 10:10:25 PM EST)

this is the best one yet

cool (0 replies)
started by murdawg13
(11.03.2000 5:01:56 PM EST)

I am a con. worker and every reason on there is a good one

damn (0 replies)
started by razor696
(10.03.2000 0:29:04 AM EST)

yo momma so stupid she sits on the celing fan and watches the floor.
wait, that's not stupid, i do that.
DOH!

man, fuck that

Yo Momma (0 replies)
started by Anonymous Goofball
(06.19.2000 8:18:57 PM EST)

Yo Momma is so fat that you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her out of the house!

i'll do it (0 replies)
started by boobie
(06.12.2000 11:55:31 PM EST)

sounds like it would be kinda fun...

Works for ME (1 reply)  
started by Anonymous Goofball
(05.26.2000 12:59:54 PM EST)

I'd do it!!!!!

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